Destiny: Blessed Sight
by KateCarter
Summary: Post-"Unimatrix Zero". Janeway's POV. Companion to "Destiny: Painful Sight"


Destiny: Blessed Sight  
  
By Kate O'Riley  
  
Disclaimer: Paramount owns them, but they were stupid enough to let Braga have something to do with them. So I'm borrowing them, to let them have a quick bit of happiness before being thrown back into oblivion.at least until another fan fic writer brings them back out. Which won't be long, since the thing every serious J/Cer loves most, of course, is fan fic!  
  
Codes: J/C.is there anything else? Spoilers: "Unimatrix Zero" Series: This is part of the Destiny series, the other Janeway story being "True Irony", the other Chakotay stories being "Invisible Man" and the companion to this, "Painful Sight". I'm also working on more "Destiny" stories. If you want to keep an eye out for them, they're the ones with "Destiny: (title)". They'll also mention a companion piece. To fully comprehend each story.read both.  
  
Other: Please excuse me if the details aren't entirely correct, it's been a while since I saw "Unimatrix Zero". E-mail me any corrections, and I'll be happy to make them.  
  
=/\=  
  
Personal log, supplemental.  
  
I was assimilated by the Borg. And lived to tell the tale.  
  
I never fully comprehended how incredibly frightening assimilation was. When the drones captured us.I didn't let it show, but I was scared to death. All I could think was, "I'll never see Chakotay again".  
  
It was terrifying. I was strapped to a table, unable to move, while they pushed implants into me. I felt this terrible burning, itching sensation, as nanoprobes were inserted into me. I screamed. I admit it, I screamed long and hard. I screamed in pain, in terror, in fright. I screamed for Chakotay. Some small part was hoping he'd save me. He couldn't, not without terrible danger to Voyager. I didn't want to have the ship put at risk. I'd rather die. I screamed until my throat was raw and burning, until there was nothing coming out of my mouth. In rooms to either side of me, I could hear B'Elanna and Tuvok screaming too. It was about that time the blessed blackness came.  
  
When I came to, I was still lying on the table, but I wasn't restrained, and all the drones were gone. Almost all. B'Elanna was standing next to me. I hardly recognized her. I remember thinking, "Oh, B'Elanna, what have they done to you?" before answering myself. "The same thing they did to you, Kathryn. You probably look just as bad."  
  
"Captain?" she asked. I nodded. "Yes, B'Elanna."  
  
She looked so relieved. "Thank goodness, it's still you," she said. It would have been a strange comment in other situations. It wasn't here. I had to concentrate to hear her, to drown out the voices in my head. The great, monotonous voice.  
  
I got up. I was in terrible pain, but if B'Elanna could handle it, so could I. I clenched my jaw and thought of Chakotay. Every muscle in my body felt like it was on fire, but I just kept thinking of him.  
  
We found Tuvok fairly quickly. He, too, was just regaining consciousness. I touched his face. "Tuvok. We have to continue on our mission."  
  
He nodded and stood up. "I will try, Captain." The strain on him was obvious.  
  
I wrote the rest of the story, on the Borg cube, in my report. But I'll tell what happened afterwards.  
  
When we materialized in Sickbay, I'd never been so grateful for a hologram before. The Doctor had a phaser in his hand, and he stunned Tuvok fairly quickly. B'Elanna, for some reason, got a tad giddy and started advancing towards him. "We are the Borg. You will be assimilated." When the Doctor swung the phaser around to her, she put her hands up. "No, Doc, I'm all right, honest! Well, not all right, but.attend to Tuvok first." Tom's influence had obviously been rubbing off.  
  
I nodded confirmation. "We're still individuals. Tuvok needs to be disconnected, quickly, though."  
  
The Doctor nodded. "I'll start immediately. But first." He injected me with something. Instantly, the pain and the voices lessened. I could still hear them, but it was easier to ignore now.  
  
I gave him as much of a smile as I could manage. "Thank you, Doctor." I headed to the replicator. "Coffee, black." I needed it.  
  
As it was still forming, the door opened, and Chakotay came rushing in, followed by Tom. It was obvious where Chakotay was headed, and I held my hand up to stop him.  
  
"No, Chakotay. Don't come any closer. I can still hear them. They've broken Tuvok. I don't want them to break me too. I don't want to hurt you." I tried to smile. "Besides, I can't control these things," I said, holding up my hand. Assimilation tubules were popping in and out, in and out. "Don't want to accidentally assimilate you." It hurt, so badly, to see the pain in his eyes, at not being able to hold me, as I know he wanted to. I hurt, because I wanted him to. I wanted him to take me in his arms, whisper my name, hug me so I could barely breath. But my weakened body couldn't stand it, and I couldn't stand injuring him.  
  
I saw Tom and B'Elanna attempting a hug anyway, and I envied them. I envied the way Tom so carefully put his arm around her, pulling away at the slightest wince. I envied them, as Tom carefully traced her forehead ridges, then kissed her.  
  
I looked back at Chakotay. He was still watching me. I picked up my coffee and sat on a biobed. He sat across from me. "What happened, Kathryn?" he asked softly.  
  
I gave a shudder. "I'd rather not talk about it right now, if you don't mind, Chakotay." I tried to smile. "How's Voyager?" We talked about things like that until the Doctor called me up for surgery, last, at my insistence. I laid down on the surgical bed, felt the Doctor give me a hypospray, and the last thing I was aware of was Chakotay watching me as darkness took me.  
  
The next sensation I was aware of was pain. It wasn't much, just a dull ache, but I felt it throughout my entire body, along with the throbbing sensation caused by new, regenerated skin.  
  
Then, I was aware of someone next to me. I knew who it would be immediately. The smell confirmed it. I opened my eyes, my lips going into a smile, a real smile, not one of the half-hearted ones I'd given before.  
  
"Chakotay."  
  
He was there, watching me. His mouth turned into a smile too, as he watched me. "Kathryn." It came out as a whisper, but it would take many words to describe the feelings I got from that word. End log. 


End file.
